My two cents on 75w140:
I swapped out the diffs on my 4runner with units from East Coast Gear. East Coast specifically required Lucas 85w140 for their units or they would not honor the warranty. It's been a while since then, but I remember speaking to one of their reps about it and he said larger tires and increased loads called for the higher weight rating to be used. I put that in the 4runner and it was perfectly fine.
I'm certain that Jeep calls for the lower weight rating to bump the fuel economy a tiny bit.
We all have 392's with tons of HP and Torque and most of us have 35's or larger tires. I'd say the 85w140 is a sensible way to go and I don't think it's ever going to cause a failure. If you don't agree, use whatever you like. For me, East Coast sets up and sells thousands of diffs every year. I trust their opinion.
One thing to note about the suggested things from Manufacturer Engineers:
If you get a 60,000 mile power train warranty, that's their target. For example, if you ask a Chrysler Engineer "if we change the oil every 10,000 miles, will the engine last through the 60,000 mile warranty most of the time" they will say yes. THEN ask "how often should we change the oil to make it to 100,000 miles most of the time" they will probably say, change the oil a lot more frequently...
Here's a link to a 3 page recommendation from ECGS that gets into the details on Temp, Cling and Water in the oil.
This is a great read for sure. https://eastcoastgearsupply.com/files/PDF Files/ecgs-gear-oil-recommendation1.pdf